Oxytocin & PMS: How Self-Soothing Practices Can Transform Your Luteal Phase

As I was preparing for this month’s Somatic Vinyasa classes at The Painted Barn; Exploring the theme of ‘touch and connection’ I found myself reflecting on how I personally experience this in my cycle. The week before my period has always been a time when I feel more sensitive, more introverted and yet, in need of more comfort—a time when I crave warmth, closeness, and slower movement. I started to notice how much better I felt when I leaned into these needs rather than pushing through them.

This awareness led me to dive deeper into oxytocin, often called the “love hormone”, and how it could be a key player in supporting us during the premenstrual phase (luteal phase). Oxytocin is released when we experience pleasure, connection, and soothing touch—all things that can ease PMS symptoms like mood swings, anxiety, and stress. As children we need this soothing connection with a mother or a parent figure to learn about self soothing, and yet as adults we don’t recognise when we need this support.

What’s Happening in the Luteal Phase?

Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) encompasses clinically significant somatic and psychological manifestations during the luteal phase of the menstrual cycle, leading to substantial distress and impairment in functional capacity.

After ovulation, progesterone levels rise, and our body shifts into a slower, more introspective mode. If no pregnancy occurs, progesterone and oestrogen levels drop, which can lead to symptoms like:

• Increased emotional sensitivity (feeling teary, irritable, or overwhelmed)

• Lowered stress resilience (things that wouldn’t normally bother you might feel like a big deal)

• Cravings for comfort (both physically and emotionally)

• Heightened need for connection (or, conversely, more desire for solitude)

Premenstrual syndrome (PMS) is complex, and scientists don’t fully understand what causes it (Gudipally et al, 2023). Essentially, PMS is a mix of hormonal shifts, brain chemistry, stress response, and overall body function, which is why symptoms can vary so much from person to person.

One of the best ways to work with this phase rather than against it is by increasing oxytocin, which counteracts stress hormones like cortisol and promotes calm, connection, and overall well-being.

How to Boost Oxytocin & Support Yourself During PMS

 

Here are some practical, evidence-backed ways to increase oxytocin naturally, which I’ve been integrating into both my personal life and our Somatic Vinyasa practice this month.

1. Self-Massage & Sensory Touch

• Heart Hold: Place one hand on your heart and the other on your belly. Take slow, deep breaths, letting your hands feel like anchors of support. This can be especially soothing if you’re feeling anxious or emotional.

• Self-Massage: Massaging your temples, neck, and face can promote the release of oxytocin.

• Scalp Massage: Use your fingertips to gently massage your scalp, releasing tension and promoting relaxation.

• Warm Oil Massage (Abhyanga): In Ayurveda, self-massage with warm oil (such as sesame or almond oil) is deeply nourishing, calming the nervous system, and activating oxytocin release.

2. Physical Connection (Even When You Don’t Feel Like It)

• Hug someone you trust. Even a 20-second hug is enough to boost oxytocin.

• Ask for a massage. I’ve been noticing how much of a difference it makes to actually ask for what you need—whether it’s a back rub from my partner or just a hug from a loved one to even booking a massage with someone as a self care routine.

• Cuddle up with a pet. If you have a pet, stroking their fur and being close to them can significantly reduce stress and raise oxytocin levels.

• Eye Contact: Maybe touch doesn’t feel right for you, even holding eye contact with someone can help to release oxytocin

3. Gentle, Nourishing Movement

In our Somatic Vinyasa practice, I’ve been weaving in self-touch and massage, rolling movements, and deep breaths—all ways to encourage the body to soften and release oxytocin naturally. Some of my favorite movements include:

• Rocking & swaying (in seated, on your back, or child’s pose)

• Placing hands on different parts of the body while breathing deeply

• Slow, fluid, undulating movements to stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system

4. Warmth & Comfort Rituals

• Drink something warm. Herbal teas like chamomile, lavender, or cinnamon support relaxation and warmth in the body.

•Essential Oils & Scents: Introducing comforting and calming aromas can also promote the release of oxytocin.

• Take a bath or have a Sauna. Warm water not only relaxes muscles but increases oxytocin and lowers stress.

• Wrap yourself in a blanket. Literally cocooning yourself in something soft sends signals of safety and comfort to the brain.

5. Sleep and Rest

•  Giving priority to sleep is crucial for daily functioning, especially during the luteal phase.

• Practicing Yoga Nidra before bedtime can prepare you for a wonderfully restful night. Join my Rest and Restore Class at Hotpod to experience Yoga Nidra and learn healthy sleep habits.  

The Power of Asking for What You Need

 

One of my biggest takeaways this month has been the importance of tuning into my needs and actually voicing them. Instead of waiting for someone to offer support, I’ve been practicing asking:

• “Can you give me a hug?”

• “Would you rub my shoulders for a minute?”

• “I need a little extra care today—can we have a quiet evening together?”

It sounds simple, but just acknowledging what I need and allowing myself to receive it has been a huge shift.

Final Thoughts

If you’ve been feeling extra sensitive, emotional, or craving comfort in the lead-up to your period, you’re not alone—and your body is asking for something important. Rather than pushing through, see if you can embrace this phase with softness, self-compassion, and oxytocin-boosting rituals.

I’d love to hear—what helps you feel most supported during this time? Have you noticed the impact of touch, movement, or connection on your PMS symptoms? 💛